NAUGHTY JOKES AND CHUTKULE

Premika ki ankho me bhengapan tha.
Premi se pucha- kya meri ankhen susila se milati hai?
Premi bola- khak milati hai. aapas me to milati hi nahi.

Ek ladaka, apani girl friend ko kis kar raha tha.
Tabhi ladaki ka bhai dekh leta hai aur guse me kahata hai,
"abhi main batata hun ki meri bahan ka chumban kaise liya jata hai."
Ladaka bola- maph kijiye aapne der kar di. ye to main sikh chuka hun.

Ek sipahi ne ek sajjan se kaha - maph kijiye mujhe pata nahi tha ki park ke andhere kone me
Aap jis aurat ko chum rahe the vah aapki patni thi.
Sajjan bole, "maphi ki koi bat nahi. aapne jab torch ki rausani dali tabhi mujhe bhi yah pata chala."

My aunt is a crossed eyed teacher who cannot control her pupils.
And one of her pupils replied to this joke and said, 'jokes could not get cornea these days!'.

Captain: naujavan aage badho.
Itna sunte hi sabhi sainik aage badh gaye lekin santa vahin khada rah gaya.
Captain ne santa se pucha- santa tum kyon nahi gaye.
Santa: sir apne to kaha nau javan aage badho lekin mai to 10va javan hun.

Do aurat aapas me apne-apne pati ki badai karne lage.
Pahli: mera pati bahut padha likha hai.
Dusari: mera pati sabse jyada padha likha hai.
Pahli: tumhra pati kitna padha hai?
Dusari: mera pati itna padha likha hai ki wo kuch likh de to koi nahi padh pata hai. lekin tumhara pati kitna padha likha hai?
Pahli: mera pati itna padha likha hai, itna padha likha hai ki yadi wo kuch likh de to wo khud nahi padh pata hai.