NAUGHTY JOKES AND CHUTKULE

Patient : "on the top of your prescription these words were printed: we treat; god cures. if so, should i pay the bills to you or shall i send it to god?"
Doctor: "pay me. i will send it."

Judge: why did you steal the car?
Man: i had to get to work.
Judge: why didn’t you take the bus?
Man: i don’t have a driver’s license for the bus.

Doctor: hello, did you come to see me with an eye problem?
Patient: wow, yes, how can you tell?
Doctor: because you came in through the window instead of the door.

Patient - i do not understand why my condition is worse from a past few days.
Doctor - you need rest, i am giving you sleeping pills, feed those to your wife.

A man took his 5-year-old son to the doctor.
Man- doctor my child has swallowed the key of the flat.
Doctor - how long has he swallowed the keys?
Man- 10 days doctor- it took you ten days to bring him here, where were you these days?
Man- i had another duplicate key of the flat and it is lost today.

Patient: doctor, the nurse very good. i feel very good when she touches me.
Doctor: i know, i heard the voice of the slap too.